so much high school

Gensan Day #7

My aunt once said, "Prepare yourself to be somebody when your out at the crowd, you don't know who you'll encounter and it might be your last meeting".

Vanity has taken it's toll on me, while I was browsing my old high school photos I was very both disappointed and ecstatic on what I saw. Disappointed because as usual my weight doesn't seem to be consistent while ecstactic because even if I don't belong to our yearly "headturners" list I am proud to say that I look presentable no matter what.

Okay. I won't lie. Lately, I have been thinking a lot about high school even if as long as I could remember I was so excited to get out from all the pressure in high school. Everyone seem to know me, they know my family, they know I play volleyball, they know I am the 'prom queen'. They thought they know so much about me. Deep inside I am a struggling student. My routine was to go to school and go home for lunch, went back to school then after school I need to practice for volleyball until sometimes 8pm just to enhance whatever skills I had. For the weekend I need to play for volleyball competitions. I don't even listen to class, they know I had a lot of sources about people. (for those gossipers) they run to me for some juicy insights.

God knows how much I miss high school.

Everyone seems to have a motivation to live on. I do have one, of course.

I am wondering if I reached that goal how will people look at me in their new perspective on what I was back in high school.

I am sure I changed a lot. Sometimes, I am being anti-social already because I want everything to be too perfect when they see me. But it does not come often.

Day by day, all I want to do is to reach that goal again, people may get offended again, people might not understand.

I am sick not to have a hearty fare again.